Imperfect as Fvck!

Learn to laugh at yourself.

Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Yes. Does the title offend you? Do you think it's 'inappropriate'? That's another pointer that you are imperfect.

As long as this world continues to be diverse, with different communities, different laws, different countries, traditions, cadars, hills, and valleys, humans will continue to be imperfect, and that's the plain truth.

If this is the case, why not forever be flexible and open to learning? Why not acknowledge and rest in the fact that you're not a perfect person, that you make mistakes, that not all your ideas are the right ones, not all your beliefs are the truth, not all the things you know and live your life by today are the ideal things to know and way to live in someone else's community? Why not learn to laugh at yourself?

When you learn to laugh at yourself, you will become more self aware, be more open and favorably disposed to criticisms and corrections. When you accept yourself to be human, you become better than the average human.

When you accept yourself to be human, you become better than the average human.

You see, the average human likes to think that his opinions are the right ones, that the ancient landmarks he's living his life by are the right landmarks just because they are ancient.

The average human likes to think that his religion is the way to eternity and everyone else who believes something different will ‘go to hell.’ Forgetting that, "in someone else's religion, we are all going to hell."

It doesn't make you less of the person you are now when you accept that you're imperfect, not all knowing and can fail and make huge, impossible mistakes.

In fact, it makes you more of a person. It makes you a better human, it makes you more empathic to other people's mistakes and indiscretions, and it makes you appreciate and love yourself more because you are less disappointed.

This newsletter was supposed to be about responding favorably to criticisms, but I realize, it's beyond just that. It's a far deeper issue than just dispelling and refuting criticism.

If you hate being corrected and criticised (regardless of the motive); you get sore angry when somebody spots a fault or a mistake in what you have made; you feel unbearably embarrassed and your confidence let down when you cut your shoes/slippers on a journey and have to walk on a barefoot, or when you trip off and fall while people are watching, then it means you're being an average human, one who thinks in his head that he should be perfect. Such a life being lived in a grandeur of illusion.

Listen, the only way to be more human and transcend the mediocrity that pervades our lives today is to know deep within, that you are perfectly imperfect, perfectly blemished, constantly learning, unlearning, and becoming.

You're not always right, so expect to be corrected. You will always make a mistake, so expect to be faulted. Your skills and products won't truly be perfect, so expect criticism and be favorably disposed to it.

The mind that is constantly learning and growing will know that it has its shortcomings. A sage in one man's culture is a dimwit in another man's culture. A righteous man in one man's religion is going hell in another man's religion.

As a result, dear Imperfect, learn to laugh at yourself. When you make mistakes, when you trip and fall, when you fail, when you perform below expectations. Don't venture into a dark place of regret, guilt, disappointment, hatred and anger. Let it be a further proof that you are human, and laugh at yourself.

And finally, avail the opportunity to other people around you to be humans too, my friend. Don't be a fucking beast to other people around you. Live and let live. Be human, and let other people be humans too.

That way, you are able to free yourself of all the pains that come with trying to be what you're not, and with that freedom, you will give yourself to consistent learning and become all you can be as the human that you are.

To your growth,

To our growth,

Your Coach,

Abiola Okunsanya,

Handzinspired.