Complain Away!

Give up your chance to grow.

Champions never complain. They are too busy getting better.

— John Wooden

Have you met people who'd always complain about every situation? No matter how sore depressing or how flowery the situation or circumstance is, these people will still find a way to cast a shadow on it. I am sure we have met at least one person who's like that. They complain about the thorns around roses instead of appreciate the fact that thorns have roses.

There are people like that, even people closest to us. In fact, many of us are like that, but it is time to change, because if you are complaining, it means you are not growing.

Complaining means you think all the odds are stacked against you and there's no way out. Complaining means you think things should be better, and you can't do anything about the fact that it is not better. Complaining means you're focusing only on the problem and you're ignoring all the silver linings there is. If you are complaining about a situation, you will not grow out of that situation.

Before leaving for work this morning, did your fridge complain about the food you put in it and the one you took out? Even if it could have, do you think it would have? No? Why? Because it has the capacity to contain the food efficiently. Complaining means you don't have any power or capacity over the situation, and that is almost always false.

There are people who will complain no matter how good they have it, and there are people who won't complain no matter how bad they have it. They will grow through the pain and the unfortunate situation that would have caused complain and build capacity, but you see those who complain? They will never do good work, they will never move from the position, because by complaining, they have admitted that they don't have the power to fix things and they lack the capacity to best the situation.

Don't be that person even in times when you truly believe you can have it better. There are people who have had it worse and still came out of it flourished and grown because they never complained, and they simply chinned up, chested out and pushed along.

There are those who are having it worse at the moment, who still continue to find the silver lining and continue hold on to it as they grow and get the best of the situation.

Don't complain that the economy is bad, instead challenge yourself to earn more. Grow through it. Don't complain that your friends keep hurting you, instead reflect on your sense of judgement in choosing friends and get better. Don't complain that you have a toxic boss, take it as a challenge glean the best you can from the worst situation possible, or take it as a challenge to grow new skills and hunt for better jobs.

Don't complain that you're doing hard work and you're getting tasks harder than you can handle. See it as an opportunity to flourish, for the harder the task, the more tenacity required, and the more you build capacity. How will you grow your skills and capacity if you don't do hard things?

Look inward, find that point in your life where you constantly complain about stuff, you would almost always find that you're not growing in that area of your life. You are either complaining or growing. You can't be doing both.

So if you want to grow in that area you have discovered, simply stop complaining and do what you know you need to do.

There's nothing that you are going through right now that doesn't have a solution in itself. Don't let your mind trick you into believing it is out of your control. No, it is not!

You are either complaining or growing. You can't do both.

I know it is easier typed and written than done, because this imperfect human mind loves to complain. There's a dopamine effect in passing off the blame and excuse to someone or something else by complaining. There's a high we get from relieving ourselves of responsibilities by complaining, but where then is your power? Where then is your growth?

Whoever and whatever you pass off the blame, excuse, responsibilities to through complaining is who or what you give your power to grow your life to.

This week, when you feel the urge to complain, pause, reflect, of what good is it to complain instead of find a way to grow out of the situation? If complaining does the trick and helps you grow, then complain away. But it definitely wouldn't, so stop making the mistake. Stop complaining. Start growing.

To your growth,

Abiola Okunsanya,

Handzinspired. ✨